Woman who texted boyfriend from NJ to kill himself pleads guilty


Alexander Urtula and Inyoung You attended Boston College. (CNN Wire via Suffolk County District Attorney’s Office)

BOSTON — A former Boston College student who prosecutors say drove her boyfriend to take his own life with thousands of text messages has pleaded guilty to involuntary manslaughter.

Inyoung You on Thursday received a 2 1/2 year suspended jail sentence and 10 years of probation and was barred by a judge from profiting from her case in any way. The sentence means You can avoid time behind bars if she adheres to all the terms of her probation.

Prosecutors say You sent Alexander Urtula, of New Jersey, thousands of messages in the last two months of their relationship, including many urging him to “go kill yourself.”

Urtula died in May 2019.

During You’s arraignment, Assistant District Attorney Caitlin Grasso described Urtula as a driven and strong-willed young man with no history of mental issues whose life was upended during a short but tumultuous relationship with You.

You used abuse and repeated threats to harm herself to isolate Urtula from his friends, Grasso said. On one occasion, she threatened to take her life by jumping from the same garage rooftop from which Urtula eventually killed himself, the prosecutor said.

“Alex felt trapped, like he had no option but to stay with her because her life was literally in his hands,” Grasso quoted one witness as saying.

The relationship became so toxic that Urtula essentially ceded his autonomy to You, Grasso said. She read a text message in which the young man wrote, “You own me all of me. Only you. You have have complete control of me emotionally and physically, and you dictate my happiness.”

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