‘Killer Dolphins’ escape in Ukraine

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Three highly-trained attack dolphins with guns attached to their flippers have gone AWOL in the black sea.

This Doctor Evil-style freakiness is courtesy of the Ukrainian navy.

The dolphins are trained to use special knives and firearms to kill enemy divers.

Attack Dolphin

Three highly-trained attack dolphins with guns attached to their flippers have gone AWOL in the black sea. (Photo/frame grab from Austin Powers Goldmember)

But recently, these murderous mammals disappeared, according to Ria Novosti News.  They went rogue, presumably to go in search of mates.

It’s believed that dolphins are the second best choice to arm with weapons.

The American military has a dolphin program, but those animals aren’t trained to shoot or stab divers.

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14 comments

  • Sean

    So the Ukraine Navy feels threatened by SCUBA divers? Are their ships made of balsa wood? And how does a dolphin distinguish enemy divers from friendly divers? Can they distinguish between friendly Ukrainian hobby divers and hostile Ukrainian subversive divers? As an American – at least I can take solace in the fact that it's not just the US military that pisses away its citizen’s tax dollars.

      • Sean

        Jordan – I wish … Oh how I do wish I just being sarcastic. The fact is that my country, the USA, annually spends more “defense” than the next 10 biggest spending countries COMBINED! We spend more on defense than China, Russia, England, France, Germany, Japan, Saudi Arabia, Italy, Brazil, and South Korea COMBINED! And while Rome burns – congress is trying to order 300 more M1 tanks – and the Army doesn't even want them. We have F-22 and F-35 jets on which we've spent BILLIONS, and they've never seen combat. We have the biggest, baddest, most expensive military in history. And yet uneducated right-wing religious zealots in Afghanistan and the middle-East have kicked our ass for more than a decade using ancient AK-47s, ancient RPGs, and IEDs.

      • Sean

        They’re still there, and we're getting the fuck out because we haven’t defeated them (my prayers are with the brave US airmen, seamen, marines, and soldiers who've died needlessly, and my heart goes out to families who've their lost young sons and daughters). Meanwhile – the military is saying it needs better educated enlistees, and the US House of Reps is saying we can't afford Head Start programs. We are going broke while our hard-earned tax dollars are squandered on the military. Jordan – I wish this was just sarcasm, but the tragedy is that it's simply reality. We CAN NOT afford to be the world’s police force

  • Erichs

    Well with only about 1% of the world's population concerned with the environment and only about .1% actually doing anything beside just talking about it, mankind is really doomed. It cannot last. with money and politics governing how we live our lives well you know we now as a race either don't care or just turn a blind eye to it. But the banks are now selling mortgages to the Ukrainians in large blocks as well as to the Chinese. The same thing will now collapse the entire world;s economy.

  • melija

    omg and this is what u get for screign with wildlife , incredible u got dolphins wearing guns , wtf?????/

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